Can you really coach someone to feel confident?

I have just had a wonderful holiday. While I’ve been away, I have had some interesting questions asked. Can you really coach someone to feel confident? Confidence isn’t an emotion, is it?

Can you coach some to feel happiness? Can you coach someone to feel excitement? I believe you can use techniques that help you feel happier, to feel more excitement and to feel more confident. I believe you can coach someone to feel more confident because I believe confidence is an emotion, a feeling.

Travelling and arrangements are one of the areas where I can lack confidence or undermines my confidence. I’ve mentioned before that I think this comes from undiagnosed dyslexia as a child. Times, structure and clear arrangements help me feel confident. On this occasion my marvellous partner had all the arrangements sorted. He understands my need to be everywhere early, and to be told several times when the plane leaves, or how long the journey should take. He helps me build my confidence by giving me the details repeatedly! The man is a saint! He understands the techniques I need to help me build my confidence. He naturally coaches me. He has the skill to treat me like an individual and understands my needs are different to others in his life.

That’s how I work; one to one, confidentially, listening carefully to my clients, to really understand where they feel they lack confidence. We are all unique and no one persons insecurities are the same as another. So yes, you really can coach someone to feel confident.

“Wild Girl”

I watched Helen Skelton being interviewed about her new book “Wild Girl: How to have incredible outdoor adventures”

In the interview I got quite emotional when I heard her say;

 “One of the things that made me write that (Wild Girl), was I was with my son in Blackpool and we saw a little girl on a slide and he went “Oh she’s on her own, why’s she not with her mummy” and I said “Oh she’s very brave” and my son went “Oh like you mummy” That’s the best thing anyone’s said to me”

I thought how wonderful for your children to think of you as brave. This book is about not being afraid to try new things, but for some to be brave you don’t have to take on feats of endurance, just stepping out of your comfort zone and doing something for the first time, can be enough. Most of us lack confidence in a variety of different situations, fear and anxiety can stop us in our tracks. But often asking for help can be the first step.

Walker books description “From kayaking the length of the Amazon to cycling to the South Pole and running an ultra-marathon across the Namib desert, the Blue Peter and Countryfile presenter Helen Skelton has taken on record-breaking feats of endurance and shown that adventures definitely are for girls. Helen shares six stories of her most daring adventures across some of the world’s most extreme wildernesses, explaining how she embraced her fears and found the positives in the toughest situations. Alongside her inspirational tales are ideas for where readers can find their own wild adventures closer to home and accounts of the real-life wild girls who inspire her.”


The Teapot Tearoom and Garden at Britchcombe Farm, Oxfordshire put on a yearly music festival “Stickyjamfest”. This year I went to see it and all the performers looked so comfortable on stage, having been given a wonderful opportunity to perform with an appreciative and confidence building audience.

For some, performing on stage or presenting, can make them feel physically sick. But there are tips and techniques to take all eyes off you and make the experience far more pleasurable for all concerned. You don’t have to be a professional singer or performer to enjoy the experience of being on stage and loving every minute of it, or presenting to a room full of people feeling confident as an expert in your field. Understanding you can’t please all of the people all of the time, means you don’t have to. Put all eyes on your audience and your enjoyment will radiate out to them, so they have a good time too.